Caroline's obit  

Caroline. Carol. Carylle. Carolita. Carolina. Maple. Mom. Gigi. A woman of unique qualities, distinctive eras, and colorful stories.

Born on a naval base in 1943 in Norfolk, Virginia, Caroline spent most of her childhood living in northern New Jersey, closely connected to extended family. After graduating from Connecticut College, she attended graduate school in California, where she met and married her first husband David Israelstam, with whom she enjoyed 1960’s San Francisco.  A few years later, she began a new chapter, traveling East on a road trip with Louie Slyder, who became her second husband. Caroline and Louie and their three children, Annabelle, Allegra and Eli, lived in Pennsylvania on the beautiful wooded expanse of “Fern Territory,” until Caroline and the kids returned to Essex Fells, NJ in 1979. Caroline later married Mitch Medina, with whom she traveled extensively until they parted ways in 2001. Regarding marriage, Caroline always liked to say that she “made six good decisions.”

Caroline spent many years in Essex Fells and North Caldwell, NJ, enjoying a large circle of friends in her neighborhood, various churches, and the art community. She continued to practice counseling, and express her creativity through painting. Caroline was a prolific artist, creating primarily in acrylic and pastel, earning many awards in juried exhibits and filling every inch of her walls with her colorful pieces. Some friends even have “Caroline home galleries.”

In 2017, after suffering a stroke, Caroline moved to western Massachusetts to be closer to her daughters and sister. She made Kimball Farms Life Care Community in Lenox her home for the better part of her last decade. In her retirement she enjoyed the picturesque Berkshire hills and clouds, many cultural outings to plays and galleries, and swimming in nearby lakes. She also had a final love, Moe England.

Caroline filled her 81 years with adventures great and small: a European tour as a teen, art school in Mexico, a safari in Africa, a family trip to Spain for her son’s wedding. It would take pages to recount the many places she journeyed and experiences she had, though many of her fondest travels were less exotic. Lifelong family trips to a small island in Maine were her favorite.

Of all her life pursuits and accomplishments, family was most important. She relished watching her grandchildren grow and took great joy in large extended family gatherings. Her greatest sadness in life was the unexpected death of her son, Eli, just six months before her own passing. She may well have died of a broken heart.

Caroline died in the Kimball Farms Nursing Care Center in Lenox, MA, peacefully in her sleep. In her last few days, she celebrated her 81st birthday and was surrounded by love and song with family and friends. Always the first to throw parties, on her final day she had a few hours of alert clarity, giving those with her the gift of her humor and a toast with imaginary margaritas.

Caroline is survived by her two daughters, Annabelle Coote and Allegra Haupt; her siblings, Steve Bartholomew, Jr. and Sue Owings; her sons-in-law, Tom Coote and Ric Haupt; brother-in-law, Kenny Owings; sister-in-law, Sandy Bartholomew; grandchildren Liam, Ben, Zoe, Aria and Theo; and many other relatives, friends, and loved ones. She was predeceased by her son, Eli Slyder.

She would want you all to know that she is now reunited with the many loved ones that have passed before her and with her Creator, her true lifelong best friend.

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